The same old story

Couples who think they are married, but really aren’t, is a storyline popular among Hollywood farces. Classic Hollywood has dealt with this subject many times. Even a director like Alfred Hitchcock made a movie using this storyline with Mr. and Mrs. Smith (1941), not to be confused with the Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt movie.

Fox decided to make a movie along similar lines about a decade later with the aptly named We’re Not Married (1952). The twist here is that there is more than one couple that isn’t married. So instead of focusing on the decision one couple will make, to remain married or go their separate ways, we get to see five such couples. A short movie like this does not allow time for deep character development though.

Bumbling justice of the piece Melvin Bush ends up learning that he did not have the authority to marry five couples when he believed he was justice of the piece. He in fact had not been approved and only discovers this mistake two years later. So he has to send out letters to the five couples in order to tell them they aren’t married.

Ginger Rogers appears as Mrs. Steve Gladwyn. The Gladwyns were the first couple the justice married and they have ended up despising each other, despite appearing in the opening scenes as a happy couple. They eventually decide to remain married in order to keep their lucrative radio show, in which they give advice to other couples, on the air.

Marilyn Monroe is a beauty contest winner. She earns the title of Mrs. Mississippi. When she learns that she isn’t married, she faces the probability that her crown will be lost. This doesn’t deter her though as she decides to compete in the Miss Mississippi pageant, which is much more prestigious. Her “husband” and baby look on in delight, as do hundreds of other males, when she wins the Miss Mississippi crown.

The best comedy of the movie occurs when the “husband” Jeff Norris overhears someone admiring his “wife’s” looks. He asks the man if he likes what he sees. The man replies yes. Then Mr. Norris explains that the woman the man so likes is his wife. The admirer is embarrassed, but Mr. Norris says it is alright. He has to get used to it. This is something Joe DiMaggio never got used to when he married Marilyn Monroe.

The Melrose couple is composed of Louis Calhern and Zsa Zsa Gabor. Calhern is a wealthy businessman who has Gabor as his trophy wife. Gabor decides that she will divorce Calhern to get half his estate. Calhern hates this idea, but when the letter comes stating that the two aren’t married, he goes along with the plot. He gets the last laugh and Gabor ends up fainting when she finds out they were never legally married.

The movie spends most of the time on Monroe and Rogers, as they were the two Fox players in the movie. The other two couples are not developed well enough and don’t contain the name power like Louis Calhern and Zsa Zsa Gabor do.

Nunnally Johnson, who was good friends with Groucho Marx, wrote and produced the movie. Unfortunately, there are no Groucho Marx moments here. The pacing is stilted and the characters are not completely developed. This wouldn’t be the last time Johnson and Monroe would work together. They teamed up again on How to Marry a Millionaire (1953). Johnson wrote and produced the movie, but could not stand working with the new star Monroe. As for this teaming up, the movie has some bright spots, but not enough to warrant more than one viewing.